Canucks

Truncated edition.

I have to keep my powder dry for the Puckcast that we'll be recording this morning.

So just a few bullet points to get discussion going:

Who expected that W?

Forget this game.

And hope Carey Price can.

Which were the real Montreal Canadiens: the team that lost most honourably in Calgary or the one that got mercilessly stomped 24 hours later in Vancouver?

We may find out Saturday night in Edmonton, where the Canadiens will try to win their third game of this oddly lengthy season-opening road trip.

Safe bet for the two days leading up to the next game: No bowling.

With friends and family in the crowd, Carey Price was bombed for seven goals and chased in the third period.

Know what?

It wasn't his fault.

A power-play goal by Henrik Sedin in the second period turned a game into a rout.

Price had pathetic support from his D and forwards while facing a succession of odd-man rushes and a Vancouver power-play clinic.

On to Edmonton.

If Georges Vézina was the Chicoutimi Cucumber, arguably the greatest nickname in the history of sports, what's Jaroslav Halak?

The Bratislava Beetroot?

OK, not the greatest nickname in the history of sports. Considering he hung a goose egg on Vancouver last night, maybe Halak should be the Bratislava Bagel.

We've got at least until Friday night to dream up something better.

Guy Carbonneau has decreed that his number-one goaltender is the one who's winning.

And that's the Bratislava Whatever.

Jaro Halak gets the start in Philadelphia, where the Canadiens will try to win three n a row for the first time since early January.

Who's starting in Philadelphia?

At the risk of repeating myself, one stat says it all:

The Vancouver Canucks, third most penalized team in the NHL with an average of 17 PiM per game – did not take any penalties last night.

You don't have to hold, hook, trip or interefere with an opponent who is not able to skate past you or beat you to loose pucks.

You don't have to elbow, board, cross-check, rough, spear or otherwise try to intimidate players who don't compete and won't crowd the crease.

And yo certainly don't have to fight the Heavyweight  Champ unless he receies your challenge – in tripplicate and notarized – at least 48 before the game. 

But let's look on the bright side: at least we didn't have to endure the Canadiens' power-play.

OK, no more jokes. There's nothing funny about this situation.

With 25 games remaining in their glorious centennial season, your Montreal Canadiens are one of the worst teams in the National Hockey League.

Their ineptitude is a disgrace.

And this wouldn't be happening if Sam Pollock or Bob Gainey were alive today.

The stat that says it all: the Canucks were not assessed ONE SINGLE PENALTY!

That's how tough the Canadiens played this game.

Pathetic.

Bob! Do something!!!